#Web Environment Integrity

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Autoenshittification

Forget F1: the only car race that matters now is the race to turn your car into a digital extraction machine, a high-speed inkjet printer on wheels, stealing your private data as it picks your pocket. Your car’s digital infrastructure is a costly, dangerous nightmare — but for automakers in pursuit of postcapitalist utopia, it’s a dream they can’t give up on.

Your car is stuffed full of microchips, a fact the world came to appreciate after the pandemic struck and auto production ground to a halt due to chip shortages. Of course, that wasn’t the whole story: when the pandemic started, the automakers panicked and canceled their chip orders, only to immediately regret that decision and place new orders.

But it was too late: semiconductor production had taken a serious body-blow, and when Big Car placed its new chip orders, it went to the back of a long, slow-moving line. It was a catastrophic bungle: microchips are so integral to car production that a car is basically a computer network on wheels that you stick your fragile human body into and pray.

The car manufacturers got so desperate for chips that they started buying up washing machines for the microchips in them, extracting the chips and discarding the washing machines like some absurdo-dystopian cyberpunk walnut-shelling machine:

https://www.autoevolution.com/news/desperate-times-companies-buy-washing-machines-just-to-rip-out-the-chips-187033.html

These digital systems are a huge problem for the car companies. They are the underlying cause of a precipitous decline in car quality. From touch-based digital door-locks to networked sensors and cameras, every digital system in your car is a source of endless repair nightmares, costly recalls and cybersecurity vulnerabilities:

https://www.reuters.com/business/autos-transportation/quality-new-vehicles-us-declining-more-tech-use-study-shows-2023-06-22/

What’s more, drivers hate all the digital bullshit, from the janky touchscreens to the shitty, wildly insecure apps. Digital systems are drivers’ most significant point of dissatisfaction with the automakers’ products:

https://www.theverge.com/23801545/car-infotainment-customer-satisifaction-survey-jd-power

Even the automakers sorta-kinda admit that this is a problem. Back in 2020 when Massachusetts was having a Right-to-Repair ballot initiative, Big Car ran these unfuckingbelievable scare ads that basically said, “Your car spies on you so comprehensively that giving anyone else access to its systems will let murderers stalk you to your home and kill you:

https://pluralistic.net/2020/09/03/rip-david-graeber/#rolling-surveillance-platforms

But even amid all the complaining about cars getting stuck in the Internet of Shit, there’s still not much discussion of why the car-makers are making their products less attractive, less reliable, less safe, and less resilient by stuffing them full of microchips. Are car execs just the latest generation of rubes who’ve been suckered by Silicon Valley bullshit and convinced that apps are a magic path to profitability?

Nope. Car execs are sophisticated businesspeople, and they’re surfing capitalism’s latest — and last — hot trend: dismantling capitalism itself.

Now, leftists have been predicting the death of capitalism since The Communist Manifesto, but even Marx and Engels warned us not to get too frisky: capitalism, they wrote, is endlessly creative, constantly reinventing itself, re-emerging from each crisis in a new form that is perfectly adapted to the post-crisis reality:

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/10/31/books/review/a-spectre-haunting-china-mieville.html

But capitalism has finally run out of gas. In his forthcoming book, Techno Feudalism: What Killed Capitalism, Yanis Varoufakis proposes that capitalism has died — but it wasn’t replaced by socialism. Rather, capitalism has given way to feudalism:

https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/451795/technofeudalism-by-varoufakis-yanis/9781847927279

Under capitalism, capital is the prime mover. The people who own and mobilize capital — the capitalists — organize the economy and take the lion’s share of its returns. But it wasn’t always this way: for hundreds of years, European civilization was dominated by rents, not markets.

A “rent” is income that you get from owning something that other people need to produce value. Think of renting out a house you own: not only do you get paid when someone pays you to live there, you also get the benefit of rising property values, which are the result of the work that all the other homeowners, business owners, and residents do to make the neighborhood more valuable.

The first capitalists hated rent. They wanted to replace the “passive income” that landowners got from taxing their serfs’ harvest with active income from enclosing those lands and grazing sheep in order to get wool to feed to the new textile mills. They wanted active income — and lots of it.

Capitalist philosophers railed against rent. The “free market” of Adam Smith wasn’t a market that was free from regulation — it was a market free from rents. The reason Smith railed against monopolists is because he (correctly) understood that once a monopoly emerged, it would become a chokepoint through which a rentier could cream off the profits he considered the capitalist’s due:

https://locusmag.com/2021/03/cory-doctorow-free-markets/

Today, we live in a rentier’s paradise. People don’t aspire to create value — they aspire to capture it. In Survival of the Richest, Doug Rushkoff calls this “going meta”: don’t provide a service, just figure out a way to interpose yourself between the provider and the customer:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/09/13/collapse-porn/#collapse-porn

Don’t drive a cab, create Uber and extract value from every driver and rider. Better still: don’t found Uber, invest in Uber options and extract value from the people who invest in Uber. Even better, invest in derivatives of Uber options and extract value from people extracting value from people investing in Uber, who extract value from drivers and riders. Go meta.

This is your brain on the four-hour-work-week, passive income mind-virus. In Techno Feudalism, Varoufakis deftly describes how the new “Cloud Capital” has created a new generation of rentiers, and how they have become the richest, most powerful people in human history.

Shopping at Amazon is like visiting a bustling city center full of stores — but each of those stores’ owners has to pay the majority of every sale to a feudal landlord, Emperor Jeff Bezos, who also decides which goods they can sell and where they must appear on the shelves. Amazon is full of capitalists, but it is not a capitalist enterprise. It’s a feudal one:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/28/enshittification/#relentless-payola

This is the reason that automakers are willing to enshittify their products so comprehensively: they were one of the first industries to decouple rents from profits. Recall that the reason that Big Car needed billions in bailouts in 2008 is that they’d reinvented themselves as loan-sharks who incidentally made cars, lending money to car-buyers and then “securitizing” the loans so they could be traded in the capital markets.

Even though this strategy brought the car companies to the brink of ruin, it paid off in the long run. The car makers got billions in public money, paid their execs massive bonuses, gave billions to shareholders in buybacks and dividends, smashed their unions, fucked their pensioned workers, and shipped jobs anywhere they could pollute and murder their workforce with impunity.

Car companies are on the forefront of postcapitalism, and they understand that digital is the key to rent-extraction. Remember when BMW announced that it was going to rent you the seatwarmer in your own fucking car?

https://pluralistic.net/2020/07/02/big-river/#beemers

Not to be outdone, Mercedes announced that they were going to rent you your car’s accelerator pedal, charging an extra $1200/year to unlock a fully functional acceleration curve:

https://www.theverge.com/2022/11/23/23474969/mercedes-car-subscription-faster-acceleration-feature-price

This is the urinary tract infection business model: without digitization, all your car’s value flowed in a healthy stream. But once the car-makers add semiconductors, each one of those features comes out in a painful, burning dribble, with every button on that fakakta touchscreen wired directly into your credit-card.

But it’s just for starters. Computers are malleable. The only computer we know how to make is the Turing Complete Von Neumann Machine, which can run every program we know how to write. Once they add networked computers to your car, the Car Lords can endlessly twiddle the knobs on the back end, finding new ways to extract value from you:

https://doctorow.medium.com/twiddler-1b5c9690cce6

That means that your car can track your every movement, and sell your location data to anyone and everyone, from marketers to bounty-hunters looking to collect fees for tracking down people who travel out of state for abortions to cops to foreign spies:

https://www.vice.com/en/article/n7enex/tool-shows-if-car-selling-data-privacy4cars-vehicle-privacy-report

Digitization supercharges financialization. It lets car-makers offer subprime auto-loans to desperate, poor people and then killswitch their cars if they miss a payment:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4U2eDJnwz_s

Subprime lending for cars would be a terrible business without computers, but digitization makes it a great source of feudal rents. Car dealers can originate loans to people with teaser rates that quickly blow up into payments the dealer knows their customer can’t afford. Then they repo the car and sell it to another desperate person, and another, and another:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/27/boricua/#looking-for-the-joke-with-a-microscope

Digitization also opens up more exotic options. Some subprime cars have secondary control systems wired into their entertainment system: miss a payment and your car radio flips to full volume and bellows an unstoppable, unmutable stream of threats. Tesla does one better: your car will lock and immobilize itself, then blare its horn and back out of its parking spot when the repo man arrives:

https://tiremeetsroad.com/2021/03/18/tesla-allegedly-remotely-unlocks-model-3-owners-car-uses-smart-summon-to-help-repo-agent/

Digital feudalism hasn’t stopped innovating — it’s just stopped innovating good things. The digital device is an endless source of sadistic novelties, like the cellphones that disable your most-used app the first day you’re late on a payment, then work their way down the other apps you rely on for every day you’re late:

https://restofworld.org/2021/loans-that-hijack-your-phone-are-coming-to-india/

Usurers have always relied on this kind of imaginative intimidation. The loan-shark’s arm-breaker knows you’re never going to get off the hook; his goal is in intimidating you into paying his boss first, liquidating your house and your kid’s college fund and your wedding ring before you default and he throws you off a building.

Thanks to the malleability of computerized systems, digital arm-breakers have an endless array of options they can deploy to motivate you into paying them first, no matter what it costs you:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/02/innovation-unlocks-markets/#digital-arm-breakers

Car-makers are trailblazers in imaginative rent-extraction. Take VIN-locking: this is the practice of adding cheap microchips to engine components that communicate with the car’s overall network. After a new part is installed in your car, your car’s computer does a complex cryptographic handshake with the part that requires an unlock code provided by an authorized technician. If the code isn’t entered, the car refuses to use that part.

VIN-locking has exploded in popularity. It’s in your iPhone, preventing you from using refurb or third-party replacement parts:

https://doctorow.medium.com/apples-cement-overshoes-329856288d13

It’s in fuckin’ ventilators, which was a nightmare during lockdown as hospital techs nursed their precious ventilators along by swapping parts from dead systems into serviceable ones:

https://www.vice.com/en/article/3azv9b/why-repair-techs-are-hacking-ventilators-with-diy-dongles-from-poland

And of course, it’s in tractors, along with other forms of remote killswitch. Remember that feelgood story about John Deere bricking the looted Ukrainian tractors whose snitch-chips showed they’d been relocated to Russia?

https://doctorow.medium.com/about-those-kill-switched-ukrainian-tractors-bc93f471b9c8

That wasn’t a happy story — it was a cautionary tale. After all, John Deere now controls the majority of the world’s agricultural future, and they’ve boobytrapped those ubiquitous tractors with killswitches that can be activated by anyone who hacks, takes over, or suborns Deere or its dealerships.

Control over repair isn’t limited to gouging customers on parts and service. When a company gets to decide whether your device can be fixed, it can fuck you over in all kinds of ways. Back in 2019, Tim Apple told his shareholders to expect lower revenues because people were opting to fix their phones rather than replace them:

https://www.apple.com/newsroom/2019/01/letter-from-tim-cook-to-apple-investors/

By usurping your right to decide who fixes your phone, Apple gets to decide whether you can fix it, or whether you must replace it. Problem solved — and not just for Apple, but for car makers, tractor makers, ventilator makers and more. Apple leads on this, even ahead of Big Car, pioneering a “recycling” program that sees trade-in phones shredded so they can’t possibly be diverted from an e-waste dump and mined for parts:

https://www.vice.com/en/article/yp73jw/apple-recycling-iphones-macbooks

John Deere isn’t sleeping on this. They’ve come up with a valuable treasure they extract when they win the Right-to-Repair: Deere singles out farmers who complain about its policies and refuses to repair their tractors, stranding them with six-figure, two-ton paperweight:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/05/31/dealers-choice/#be-a-shame-if-something-were-to-happen-to-it

The repair wars are just a skirmish in a vast, invisible fight that’s been waged for decades: the War On General-Purpose Computing, where tech companies use the law to make it illegal for you to reconfigure your devices so they serve you, rather than their shareholders:

https://memex.craphound.com/2012/01/10/lockdown-the-coming-war-on-general-purpose-computing/

The force behind this army is vast and grows larger every day. General purpose computers are antithetical to technofeudalism — all the rents extracted by technofeudalists would go away if others (tinkereres, co-ops, even capitalists!) were allowed to reconfigure our devices so they serve us.

You’ve probably noticed the skirmishes with inkjet printer makers, who can only force you to buy their ink at 20,000% markups if they can stop you from deciding how your printer is configured:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/07/inky-wretches/#epson-salty But we’re also fighting against insulin pump makers, who want to turn people with diabetes into walking inkjet printers:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/10/loopers/#hp-ification

And companies that make powered wheelchairs:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/08/chair-ish/#r2r

These companies start with people who have the least agency and social power and wreck their lives, then work their way up the privilege gradient, coming for everyone else. It’s called the “shitty technology adoption curve”:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/21/great-taylors-ghost/#solidarity-or-bust

Technofeudalism is the public-private-partnership from hell, emerging from a combination of state and private action. On the one hand, bailing out bankers and big business (rather than workers) after the 2008 crash and the covid lockdown decoupled income from profits. Companies spent billions more than they earned were still wildly profitable, thanks to those public funds.

But there’s also a policy dimension here. Some of those rentiers’ billions were mobilized to both deconstruct antitrust law (allowing bigger and bigger companies and cartels) and to expand “IP” law, turning “IP” into a toolsuite for controlling the conduct of a firm’s competitors, critics and customers:

https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/

IP is key to understanding the rise of technofeudalism. The same malleability that allows companies to “twiddle” the knobs on their services and keep us on the hook as they reel us in would hypothetically allow us to countertwiddle, seizing the means of computation:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/12/algorithmic-wage-discrimination/#fishers-of-men

The thing that stands between you and an alternative app store, an interoperable social media network that you can escape to while continuing to message the friends you left behind, or a car that anyone can fix or unlock features for is IP, not technology. Under capitalism, that technology would already exist, because capitalists have no loyalty to one another and view each other’s margins as their own opportunities.

But under technofeudalism, control comes from rents (owning things), not profits (selling things). The capitalist who wants to participate in your iPhone’s “ecosystem” has to make apps and submit them to Apple, along with 30% of their lifetime revenues — they don’t get to sell you jailbreaking kit that lets you choose their app store.

Rent-seeking technology has a holy grail: control over “ring zero” — the ability to compel you to configure your computer to a feudalist’s specifications, and to verify that you haven’t altered your computer after it came into your possession:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/01/30/ring-minus-one/#drm-political-economy

For more than two decades, various would-be feudal lords and their court sorcerers have been pitching ways of doing this, of varying degrees of outlandishness.

At core, here’s what they envision: inside your computer, they will nest another computer, one that is designed to run a very simple set of programs, none of which can be altered once it leaves the factory. This computer — either a whole separate chip called a “Trusted Platform Module” or a region of your main processor called a secure enclave — can tally observations about your computer: which operating system, modules and programs it’s running.

Then it can cryptographically “sign” these observations, proving that they were made by a secure chip and not by something you could have modified. Then you can send this signed “attestation” to someone else, who can use it to determine how your computer is configured and thus whether to trust it. This is called “remote attestation.”

There are some cool things you can do with remote attestation: for example, two strangers playing a networked video game together can use attestations to make sure neither is running any cheat modules. Or you could require your cloud computing provider to use attestations that they aren’t stealing your data from the server you’re renting. Or if you suspect that your computer has been infected with malware, you can connect to someone else and send them an attestation that they can use to figure out whether you should trust it.

Today, there’s a cool remote attestation technology called “PrivacyPass” that replaces CAPTCHAs by having you prove to your own device that you are a human. When a server wants to make sure you’re a person, it sends a random number to your device, which signs that number along with its promise that it is acting on behalf of a human being, and sends it back. CAPTCHAs are all kinds of bad — bad for accessibility and privacy — and this is really great.

But the billions that have been thrown at remote attestation over the decades is only incidentally about solving CAPTCHAs or verifying your cloud server. The holy grail here is being able to make sure that you’re not running an ad-blocker. It’s being able to remotely verify that you haven’t disabled the bossware your employer requires. It’s the power to block someone from opening an Office365 doc with LibreOffice. It’s your boss’s ability to ensure that you haven’t modified your messaging client to disable disappearing messages before he sends you an auto-destructing memo ordering you to break the law.

And there’s a new remote attestation technology making the rounds: Google’s Web Environment Integrity, which will leverage Google’s dominance over browsers to allow websites to block users who run ad-blockers:

https://github.com/RupertBenWiser/Web-Environment-Integrity

There’s plenty else WEI can do (it would make detecting ad-fraud much easier), but for every legitimate use, there are a hundred ways this could be abused. It’s a technology purpose-built to allow rent extraction by stripping us of our right to technological self-determination.

Releasing a technology like this into a world where companies are willing to make their products less reliable, less attractive, less safe and less resilient in pursuit of rents is incredibly reckless and shortsighted. You want unauthorized bread? This is how you get Unauthorized Bread:

https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/amp/

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this thread to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/24/rent-to-pwn/#kitt-is-a-demon

[Image ID: The interior of a luxury car. There is a dagger protruding from the steering wheel. The entertainment console has been replaced by the text 'You wouldn't download a car,' in MPAA scare-ad font. Outside of the windscreen looms the Matrix waterfall effect. Visible in the rear- and side-view mirror is the driver: the figure from Munch's 'Scream.' The screen behind the steering-wheel has been replaced by the menacing red eye of HAL9000 from Stanley Kubrick's '2001: A Space Odyssey.']

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[autolenaphilia]

Fuck.

Mozilla is strongly against it.

[werewolf-kat]

How can Google's decisions for Chrome get any WORSE? What on earth is this?!

The gist: Google wants to implement a "feature" for website owners/developers to be selective on who can see their website. These devs (or their malicious higher-ups) could block out or limit Firefox users, Safari users, open source or indie browsers, etc. from their website; and worst of all, they could block or limit as far as the device you use.

Major concerns:

How can people even WANT this other than corrupt companies trying to force competing users to tediously go through the needed hoops to access the website? There's already the web design standard of optimizing load times to be welcoming for visitors. This ain't going to encourage anyone to have interest in your website (or its company by extension). It really will be a test of consumer trust.

Worryingly, lazy or more apathetic web developers might use this to dance around compatibility challenges in their websites. I've seen my fair share of these types of devs in the community who take the frustration of browser compatibilities too far. They're a minority (thankfully, seen in the video is the Chrome repository getting completely flooded with criticisms). But, yeah, pro-tip to web developers: Learn to prioritize the layout and order of your content in plain HTML first before you jump into design. And then build the CSS from there in a "ranking" of completely compatible with all browsers, to less compatibilities. So you can manage and keep track of how your site will look on anything out there.

The sheer fear and worry for accessibility in web design that I'm feeling from this, man. Again, it's not just browsers... Malicious entities making decisions for websites could block out or further limit accessibility devices (if they're counted) because of the extra work that comes with ensuring a website is accessible to a wide range of disabled or impaired users. I can't fully tell if screen reader software could somehow get affected, but who knows how far Google will want to go in this nightmare of a proposal.

Read more on this situation:

"It is also interesting to note that the first use case listed is about ensuring that interactions with ads are genuine. While this is not problematic on the surface, it certainly hints at the idea that Google is willing to use any means of bolstering its advertising platform, regardless of the potential harm to the users of the web."

Vivaldi Article

||

"The proposal threatens the free and open internet in a number of ways, but one of the biggest revolves around the fact that should there be a central server that attests to whether a browser can be trusted or not, it means that anything non-standard will not be trusted. In other words, new browsers would not be trusted, and legacy software would no longer be able to access much of the internet after a certain length of time. Given that it verifies the integrity of the browser, it could also technically block certain extensions (such as Adblock) if Google were to go down that route."

XDA Developers

||

"What makes the fingerprinting process somewhat insidious is that, unlike web cookies, no residue is left on a user’s computer – everything can be stored in the cloud. The fingerprint data can be collected even if users run private or incognito browsing sessions. Worse yet, each user’s fingerprint can be shared across websites without the user’s knowledge."

Silicon Angle

[amphobet]

Google's trying to DRM the internet, and we have to make sure they fail

[damlahayal]

RABİSU - PLATİN (2)

In an ever-evolving digital landscape, having a reliable online presence is integral to success. At Rabisu, we specialize in delivering tailored hosting solutions that empower businesses to thrive. Our diverse range of services—spanning VPS in the UK to comprehensive web hosting—ensures that every client can find the perfect fit for their unique needs. With a focus on speed, security, and seamless performance, Rabisu is dedicated to providing you with the infrastructure necessary to scale your operations and engage with your audience effectively.

VPS UK

When it comes to vps uk hosting, Rabisu stands out for its unmatched performance and reliability. Our virtual private servers are meticulously designed to cater to businesses that require a scalable and secure hosting environment without compromising on speed or up-time.

With Rabisu, you leverage cutting-edge technology that guarantees exceptional performance, allowing your applications to run smoothly even under high traffic conditions. Our VPS solutions come with full root access, enabling you to customize your environment to meet specific needs.

Additionally, Rabisu offers flexible pricing plans that ensure you get the most bang for your buck. Whether you are a start-up or a well-established organization, our plans can be tailored to suit your requirements. We believe in providing our customers with the best value, ensuring your investment drives the desired results for your business.

With 24/7 customer support, you can rest assured knowing our expert team is always available to assist you with any issues or questions you may have. Choosing Rabisu means choosing peace of mind when it comes to managing your digital infrastructure.

Secure your VPS UK hosting today with Rabisu, and take the first step towards a more efficient and scalable online presence. Visit Rabisu to get started now!

Hosting

When it comes to reliable and efficient hosting solutions, Rabisu offers a range of options tailored specifically for your needs. With our cutting-edge VPS UK hosting, you can expect exceptional performance and stability, ensuring that your website remains online and responsive at all times.

Our hosting provides you with dedicated resources, allowing you to customize your server environment according to your unique specifications. This means you have better control over your website's performance, allowing for faster load times and a superior experience for your users.

Rabisu is committed to delivering top-tier security features with our hosting services. We implement advanced security protocols to protect your data, ensuring peace of mind while you focus on growing your business.

Furthermore, our customer support team is always available, ready to assist you 24/7. Whether you're facing a technical challenge or have questions about configuring your server, our experts are just a call or message away, guaranteeing that you are never left in the dark.

In choosing Rabisu for your VPS UK hosting needs, you are opting for reliability, flexibility, and unparalleled support; what more could you ask for? Take your website to new heights with our outstanding hosting solutions today!

[all-the-fish]

Oh, you know, just the usual internet browsing experience in the year of 2024

Some links and explanations since I figured it might be useful to some people, and writing down stuff is nice.

First of all, get Firefox. Yes, it has apps for Android/iOS too. It allows more extensions and customization (except the iOS version), it tracks less, the company has a less shitty attitude about things. Currently all the other alternatives are variations of Chromium, which means no matter how degoogled they supposedly are, Google has almost a monopoly on web browsing and that's not great. Basically they can introduce extremely user unfriendly updates and there's nothing forcing them to not do it, and nowhere for people to escape to. Current examples of their suggested updates are disabling/severly limiting adblocks in June 2024, and this great suggestion to force sites to verify "web environment integrity" ("oh you don't run a version of chromium we approve, such as the one that runs working adblocks? no web for you.").

uBlockOrigin - barely needs any explanation but yes, it works. You can whitelist whatever you want to support through displaying ads. You can also easily "adblock" site elements that annoy you. "Please log in" notice that won't go away? Important news tm sidebar that gives you sensory overload? Bye.

Dark Reader - a site you use has no dark mode? Now it has. Fairly customizable, also has some basic options for visually impaired people.

SponsorBlock for YouTube - highlights/skips (you choose) sponsored bits in the videos based on user submissions, and a few other things people often skip ("pls like and subscribe!"). A bit more controversial than normal adblock since the creators get some decent money from this, but also a lot of the big sponsors are kinda scummy and offer inferior product for superior price (or try to sell you a star jpg land ownership in Scotland to become a lord), so hearing an ad for that for the 20th time is kinda annoying. But also some creators make their sponsored segments hilarious.

Privacy Badger (and Ghostery I suppose) - I'm not actually sure how needed these are with uBlock and Firefox set to block any tracking it can, but that's basically what it does. Find someone more educated on this topic than me for more info.

Https Everywhere - I... can't actually find the extension anymore, also Firefox has this as an option in its settings now, so this is probably obsolete, whoops.

Facebook Container - also comes with Firefox by default I think. Keeps FB from snooping around outside of FB. It does that a lot, even if you don't have an account.

WebP / Avif image converter - have you ever saved an image and then discovered you can't view it, because it's WebP/Avif? You can now save it as a jpg.

YouTube Search Fixer - have you noticed that youtube search has been even worse than usual lately, with inserting all those unrelated videos into your search results? This fixes that. Also has an option to force shorts to play in the normal video window.

Consent-O-Matic - automatically rejects cookies/gdpr consent forms. While automated, you might still get a second or two of flashing popups being yeeted.

XKit Rewritten - current most up to date "variation "fork" of XKit I think? Has settings in extension settings instead of an extra tumblr button. As long as you get over the new dash layout current tumblr is kinda fine tbh, so this isn't as important as in the past, but still nice. I mostly use it to hide some visual bloat and mark posts on the dash I've already seen.

YouTube NonStop - do you want to punch youtube every time it pauses a video to check if you're still there? This saves your fists.

uBlacklist - blacklists sites from your search results. Obviously has a lot of different uses, but I use it to hide ai generated stuff from image search results. Here's a site list for that.

Redirect AMP to HTML - redirects links from their amp version to the normal version. Amp link is a version of a site made faster and more accessible for phones by Bing/Google. Good in theory, but lets search engines prefer some pages to others (that don't have an amp version), and afaik takes traffic from the original page too. Here's some more reading about why it's an issue, I don't think I can make a good tl;dr on this.

Also since I used this in the tags, here's some reading about enshittification and why the current mainstream internet/services kinda suck.

[codingquill]

Essentials You Need to Become a Web Developer

HTML, CSS, and JavaScript Mastery

Text Editor/Integrated Development Environment (IDE): Popular choices include Visual Studio Code, Sublime Text.

Version Control/Git: Platforms like GitHub, GitLab, and Bitbucket allow you to track changes, collaborate with others, and contribute to open-source projects.

Responsive Web Design Skills: Learn CSS frameworks like Bootstrap or Flexbox and master media queries

Understanding of Web Browsers: Familiarize yourself with browser developer tools for debugging and testing your code.

Front-End Frameworks: for example : React, Angular, or Vue.js are powerful tools for building dynamic and interactive web applications.

Back-End Development Skills: Understanding server-side programming languages (e.g., Node.js, Python, Ruby , php) and databases (e.g., MySQL, MongoDB)

Web Hosting and Deployment Knowledge: Platforms like Heroku, Vercel , Netlify, or AWS can help simplify this process.

Basic DevOps and CI/CD Understanding

Soft Skills and Problem-Solving: Effective communication, teamwork, and problem-solving skills

Confidence in Yourself: Confidence is a powerful asset. Believe in your abilities, and don't be afraid to take on challenging projects. The more you trust yourself, the more you'll be able to tackle complex coding tasks and overcome obstacles with determination.

[mutant-distraction]

credit: Coffee loves

This is a Flying fish up close. They can propel themselves out of water at speeds of more than 56 km/h. Once in the air, their rigid “wings” allow them to glide for up to 200 meters.

Flying fish, belonging to the family Exocoetidae, are remarkable marine creatures known for their unique ability to glide above the water's surface.

These fish are equipped with unusually large pectoral fins that function like wings, allowing them to leap out of the water and glide for considerable distances to escape predators. They are primarily found in warm oceanic waters around the world, including the Atlantic, Pacific, and Indian Oceans.

Typically, flying fish can glide up to 200 meters at a speed of about 60 kilometers per hour, using their tails to generate the necessary thrust by rapidly beating the water surface before takeoff.

In addition to their distinctive gliding capability, flying fish have adapted to a variety of oceanic environments, often seen in both coastal areas and the open sea. They feed on a diet of plankton and small marine organisms, making them an integral part of the ocean's food web.

Their unique behavior not only aids in evasion from predators like dolphins and larger fish but also makes them a subject of interest for humans, leading to their depiction in folklore and their role in various culinary traditions across different cultures. Their fascinating ability to glide and their ecological importance highlight the incredible adaptability and diversity of marine life.

[nists]

now that google has an AI overview for most web searches that needlessly harms the environment, i've switched to using startpage.com as my search engine. it's based on google but simpler, and very privacy oriented. one can get an addon for Firefox that inserts it as default, and i see there is also a mobile app.

edit: i have been informed that duckduckgo may also be a decent alternative, tho one has to manually turn AI assist off. it is also integrated into Firefox without the need for addon.

[smartgirrl]

apps that boost productivity

i feel like i've tried every productivity app out there, and so i gathered my favorites so far here:

task management apps

1. todoist

features -> subtasks, recurring tasks, priority levels, and collaboration features. benefits -> easy organization of tasks with intuitive categorization helps you stay on top of deadlines.

2. tiimo

features -> color-coded daily overview of all your plans, focus timer, ai-powered checklists that break down big tasks. benefits -> flexible planning and visually rewarding, making it easy to digest your day

3. structured

features -> intuitive timeline, subtasks, focus timer, easily rearrange tasks, color coding. benefits -> visual timeline and easily creating tasks makes it easy to stay on task

this is my personal favorite!! i've been using it for a while and the visual appeal + the functions make it so easy to stay motivated.

focus and concentration apps

4. forest

features -> set a timer for focused work sessions, and if you stay off your phone, a tree grows. benefits -> visually rewarding, this app helps you build good habits and combat phone addiction.

5. focus@will

features -> different music channels tailored to various tasks and productivity styles. benefits -> the right music can create an optimal studying environment, minimizing distractions.

time management apps

6. toggl track

features -> one-click time tracking, reporting, and project management. benefits -> learning how you spend your time can help you tailor your habits.

7. pomodoro timer apps

features -> customizable work sessions (typically 25 minutes), followed by short breaks. benefits -> helps maintain focus and reduces burnout during intense study sessions.

note-taking apps

8. evernote

features -> notebooks, tags, web clipping, and integration with other apps. benefits -> keeps your study materials organized and accessible across devices.

9. onenote

features -> sections, tags, and integration with the microsoft office suite. benefits -> perfect for students who enjoy a more visual and flexible approach to note-taking.

[kashlyn]

So I asked ChatGPT:

"Which of these three is a better crossover to DC's Batfamily and why (with rankings): Danny Phantom, Miraculous Ladybug, or Marvel Cinematic Universe's Spiderman"

and here's their answer, word per word (copy-pasted and all)=

"Crossing over characters into the DC Batfamily involves evaluating how well each character's abilities, personality, and storyline could integrate with the themes and dynamics of Gotham City and the Batfamily. Let's analyze each character:

1. Danny Phantom

Pros:

Theme Compatibility: Danny Phantom's ghost-hunting and supernatural elements can mesh well with Gotham's dark and often eerie atmosphere.

Character Fit: Danny has a strong sense of justice and a personal struggle with dual identities, similar to Batman's struggle as Bruce Wayne and Batman.

Skills and Abilities: Danny's ghost powers offer unique abilities that can complement the Batfamily's more grounded skill sets.

Cons:

Tone Difference: Danny Phantom has a lighter, more comedic tone compared to the typically dark and serious tone of the Batfamily stories.

2. Miraculous Ladybug (Marinette Dupain-Cheng)

Pros:

Heroic Traits: Marinette is resourceful, strategic, and deeply cares about protecting her city, traits that align well with the Batfamily's values.

Partnership Potential: Ladybug’s teamwork and reliance on her partner, Cat Noir, can translate well into working with the Batfamily.

Skills and Abilities: Her Miraculous powers, such as the Lucky Charm and her agility, could offer unique advantages in combat and problem-solving.

Cons:

Setting and Tone: The bright, optimistic setting of Paris in Miraculous Ladybug might clash with Gotham’s darker, grittier environment.

Youthful Tone: The show’s youthful, sometimes romantic themes might not blend seamlessly with the more mature and intense themes in Batfamily stories.

3. Marvel Cinematic Universe's Spider-Man (Peter Parker)

Pros:

Theme Compatibility: Spider-Man’s street-level crime-fighting and personal struggles resonate well with the Batfamily's narratives.

Character Fit: Peter Parker's intelligence, sense of responsibility, and youthful energy can complement characters like Robin and Batgirl.

Skills and Abilities: Spider-Man’s agility, spider-sense, and web-slinging abilities can add a new dimension to the Batfamily’s crime-fighting techniques.

Cons:

Existing Lore: Integrating a well-established character from the Marvel Universe into the DC Universe could be more complex due to existing fan expectations and lore.

Ranking and Reasoning

Marvel Cinematic Universe's Spider-Man

Reason: Spider-Man’s character traits and abilities align closely with the Batfamily’s dynamics. His themes of responsibility, intelligence, and youthful energy make him a natural fit for collaborations with characters like Robin and Batgirl. Additionally, his crime-fighting style and personal struggles resonate well with Gotham’s themes.

Danny Phantom

Reason: Danny’s dual identity, sense of justice, and supernatural abilities offer a unique blend that can enhance the Batfamily’s operations. While the tone difference is a consideration, his character’s core values and abilities make him a strong contender for integration into the Batfamily.

Miraculous Ladybug

Reason: While Marinette’s resourcefulness and heroism are admirable, the tone and setting of Miraculous Ladybug present a more significant challenge for seamless integration into the darker, more mature world of Gotham. Her abilities and teamwork skills are valuable but might require more adjustments to fit perfectly into the Batfamily’s universe.

In conclusion, Spider-Man ranks highest for his natural thematic and character alignment with the Batfamily, followed by Danny Phantom for his complementary abilities and character traits, and lastly, Miraculous Ladybug, whose tone and setting present the most significant integration challenges."

[sniperct]

Its hard to really take out pieces of it, because there's a lot of really good bits that need the context, but it lays out the stark, bare facts about Gen AI and that its all been an expensive and destructive waste of time, money and the environment.

But the author did summarize part of it so I'll paste that here and I recommend reading the whole thing:

The main technology behind the entire "artificial intelligence" boom is generative AI — transformer-based models like OpenAI's GPT-4 (and soon GPT-5) — and said technology has peaked, with diminishing returns from the only ways of making them "better" (feeding them training data and throwing tons of compute at them) suggesting that what we may have, as I've said before, reached Peak AI.

Generative AI is incredibly unprofitable. OpenAI, the biggest player in the industry, is on course to lose more than $5 billion this year, with competitor Anthropic (which also makes its own transformer-based model, Claude) on course to lose more than $2.7 billion this year.

Every single big tech company has thrown billions — as much as $75 billion in Amazon's case in 2024 alone — at building the data centers and acquiring the GPUs to populate said data centers specifically so they can train their models or other companies' models, or serve customers that would integrate generative AI into their businesses, something that does not appear to be happening at scale.

Their investments could theoretically be used for other products, but these data centers are heavily focused on generative AI. Business Insider reports that Microsoft intends to amass 1.8 million GPUs by the end of 2024, costing it tens of billions of dollars.

Worse still, many of the companies integrating generative AI do so by connecting to models made by either OpenAI or Anthropic, both of whom are running unprofitable businesses, and likely charging nowhere near enough to cover their costs. As I wrote in the Subprime AI Crisis in September, in the event that these companies start charging what they actually need to, I hypothesize it will multiply the costs of their customers to the point that they can't afford to run their businesses — or, at the very least, will have to remove or scale back generative AI functionality in their products.

[grlquartz]

let the dream descend

word count: 6.3k

pairing: primo x oc

rated E for extraordinarily spicy- 18+ only !

thanks to @photiniainsummer and @ashleystillons for prereading and for always encouraging me <3 and thank you to @wrathofrats for the BEST fic divider for these two omg. for readers of this pairing's main fic, this is a glimpse into what primo has going on between chapters 9 and 10. enjoy!

A business meeting with the Clergy at the luxurious abbey in Rome is just that- business as usual. But this time, Primo has other things on his mind.

The moulding of the window’s tracery was beginning to crack. Hair-thin and webbed, tiny trails of decay through the stone mullions; they drew Primo’s gaze ever slowly, up and away from the slowly-intensifying conversation happening at the table. It made him wonder, momentarily, if anyone knew- the integrity of the window would be at risk soon enough. 

But that wasn’t his problem to solve, nor to wonder about, though it was a welcome distraction nonetheless. It seemed to him that the integrity of his current company was just as at risk, from the way that the men were speaking so callously of the one whose funeral they sat arranging, and he had to wonder: would they be so careless with their words had it been his father sitting here, rather than himself? Or was this just the way things had become, now, with the turn of order in the sect of the clergy operating here in Rome? Had the standards of conduct fallen so low in the absence of Emeritus influence? Clearly so- but at this hour, after many hours already spent debating and bickering and dragging feet, he had already resolved to wash his hands of this whole matter. It was apparent that the men before him didn’t necessarily value his opinion as much as he thought they should. His position still commanded a certain modicum of respect, he felt, despite his retirement from the head of the papacy- but these were his father’s contacts, and perhaps no matter his age or his position within the ranks of their Dark Lord’s ministry, they would always see him as disregardable; a son of Nihil, before any other title more befitting of his leadership.

And he was tired. It was a long way from home, and travel wasn’t as easy as it used to be. The change in schedule, the mental demand of the somewhat unfamiliar environment and of the tasks at hand, was enough to make him feel it- the exhaustion. It made his body feel heavy as wet clay, and made the gears of his mind turn rough. After this, he thought, he could use an early night. And a smoke. Satanas.

But what he really wanted, he found, was to return home. There was much to be done; this was a crucial point in the season for the work he was now so accustomed to doing. He had little time for his own clerical tasks, let alone to take an entire week out of such a busy month for such a menial trip. Though he had plenty of faith in the abilities of his team to take care of the work and keep an eye on things while he was gone, it just wasn’t the same. He found himself worrying mildly about the state of his gardens, teeming with their young life. Who would take such meticulous, patient care of things, the way he wanted it to be done?

Slowly, the pen he was rocking between his first fingers stilled. Discussion continued around him, like a stream over stones, but the flow quieted in his ears. He knew just who would take care of things the way he wanted it to be done.

What a gift it was that he could trust someone so quickly, especially considering how recently she had begun to learn about the art of horticulture; normally he would hesitate to entrust so much to someone with such beginner-level knowledge. But Theodora had progressed so quickly in her study that it was a small wonder that she had never learned these things before. How natural this understanding came to her. It was really something to behold.

That’s what he told himself, anyways: it was her work ethic, her persistence, her natural curiosity that created these obvious and inevitable feelings of pride, of intrigue. How rare it was that someone so young, so inexperienced in this particular spiritual world in which they resided and now in this field of work, could encourage such admiration from him- but Theodora was a rare jewel indeed.

Of their own accord, his fingers tightened around the body of the ink pen in his grasp. A jewel she was. Every facet of her glimmering in the light, every new turn revealing a side of her that he found himself utterly drawn to. He could not deny it. The girl had done much more than intrigue him in the short time that they had come to know each other.

“What do you say, Papa?” The ancient bishop sitting across from him addressed him with his title; the only sort of respect that the sour man would afford him, it seemed. It pulled him off of the trail of distraction that he could hardly resist the urge to follow. “Are we finished here?”

Finally- reprieve. Primo placed his ink pen neatly against the varnished surface and began to stand from his seat. He could not restrain the shadow of irritability in his reply. “Not a moment too soon.”

His response drew the meeting to its close. Once out of the stuffy conference room and within the airy, torch-warmed embrace of the wide hall, relief was a river coursing through his tired mind. He was finally alone; no more conversation to make, no more decisions to argue. Nothing in between himself and the long-awaited comfort of the quiet clergymen’s suite he was rooming in for the remainder of his stay, except for a short walking distance, which he determined himself to make quick work of. 

These gleaming travertine halls were not so different from the traditional corridors of the abbey he called home, and moving through them caused him to wonder, momentarily, how the ones at home might look at this time of night. Most everyone usually seemed to turn in somewhat early, retiring to their own rooms or to the rooms of others, and the clergy hallways would be quiet and vacant after the workday hours had ended. Vacant, except, perhaps…

A smile twitched at his mouth, tugging at the dried-down paint that always settled so heavily into the fine lines of his face. He remembered how he had entrusted another sort of caretaking to Theodora. Would the spare key he had given her sit heavy in the pocket of that silky dress she always wore? Would her footsteps sound that signature click, click along the stone tiles, and then soften once they fell upon the heavy rugs draped over the office floor? Softer still once she found her way into his living quarters? A feeling like nervousness suddenly began to weave itself like a threaded needle through his middle, at the thought of how she might peer around the dark, empty room…

She would take care of things, no doubt. It had seemed a substantial favor to ask her, but the more he thought about it, he realized that her industrious self would likely enjoy leaning into such a task. How gladly she had accepted the key; how neatly it had pressed into the warm palm of her small hand.

“Oh,” came a voice, and it startled him somewhat- rounding the corner into the next hall had brought him face to face with a woman, a sister of sin. One he recognized rather quickly.

She seemed startled too, at first, hence her “oh”, but quickly the woman’s lined face curdled with a particular sourness. “Primo. Here for Gisueppe’s funeral?”

Catherine was never one to make pleasantries. His heart was less hardened to her now, but seeing her here so abruptly and after such an already-draining day sent a ripple of mild annoyance through him. “My father could not be present to make arrangements,” he explained. “I am doing the clergy a favor by assisting with the preparations.”

Her ice-gray eyes brightened, but not with joy. She smiled and folded her arms over her narrow chest. “A favor? Well, aren’t you just our knight in shining armor?”

The jab was veiled with humor, but he was used to seeing straight through to her. He felt annoyance flare hotter, into irritation.

“I am only here on my father’s behalf, Catherine.”

“Still running around doing his bidding,” she said, casually enough. “Aren’t you supposed to be retired from your papal responsibilities?”

There it was- in the last words, that tone. That deep bitterness that eventually permeated every interaction that the two of them ever had to suffer through. Even after nearly twenty years, Catherine just could not seem to let it go; he could hear her words spinning on a memory reel. How he was a fool to throw away his chance to gain more power within the ministry as a unit of leadership, how he had let such ridiculous ideals destroy what could have been the greatest chapter in the history of the church… irritation iced over into a stone coldness. He was too tired to entertain her little game; her attempt to exert over him a form of power that no longer existed. He shifted, stood ever slightly taller, and looked pointed as thorns into her light eyes. “I am retired, yes.”

He could tell when she realized that he wasn’t going to play into her questioning, because that light in her eyes shaded ever so slightly. “Oh, that’s right,” she answered, sour as ever, “you’re out picking petals and playing in the dirt nowadays.”

Tension strung through him, but that stoniness remained. “A privilege.”

“Yeah, such a privilege for a man like you,” she retorted, and that was all he would entertain. “Goodnight, Catherine.”

He looked away, beyond her down the hallway, and moved to step past her; she scoffed and moved her hands to her hips, which checked her bowed elbow against him. “You know it’s the truth-”

“I am not doing this with you right now.” He looked sharply at her once more, down the darkly-painted bridge of his nose, with eyes that gleamed like polished blades in the low torchlight. Silence hovered thickly as her expression set hard. His stare pinned her in place, and though he could tell that she wanted to argue, she said nothing. There was a line that, once drawn with his authority, even she could not cross… though she was never one to leave a boundary untested.

“Yes, Papa.”

He simply looked away and brushed past the hold of her elbow to continue his path down the empty hall.

-

The room, once he had settled into it for the night, was comfortable as ever. The clergy in Rome spared no expense when it came to the comfort of their esteemed guests, and now as one of them he was pleased to reap the reward. Linen sheets welcomed him as he sat tiredly against the edge of the mattress. What a day it had turned out to be.

What was it, he wondered as he dropped even more tiredly back against the bed, with the way that he seemed to consistently encounter challenges to his authority when he was so far from home? Between the casual flippancy of his father’s men during the long and arduous process all afternoon and evening, and the brief yet bristling encounter with Catherine, he found himself coming up against all kinds of walls when it came to being recognized for his papal status. Perhaps it was merely that he was retired, and for whatever reason it altered others’ perception of him- especially in this area of the ministry’s influence. Or maybe it was just Rome; it seemed almost an entity of its own, with the way that so much was done differently here in ways both substantial and small. Either way, it was almost enough to bring out that older side of himself- that harsh, unyielding man who would make sure that no one would so much as consider denying him the respect he so deserved-

A sigh escaped him. Old habits died long ago, thankfully; he wasn’t so set on controlling the manner in which others responded to him now. How much he had changed in those later years of his papacy, especially during and after his experience with the Ghost project. Even since his retirement. Even since recently. Time just flowed faster and faster now, and yet slowed all the same.

His eyes sank shut, blocking out the low ceiling and the light of the lone lamp that seeped warmth into the luxurious room. With a quieter mind now that he had showered and settled under the covers, thoughts of bitter pasts and ever-changing presents began to fade away like the dying twilight beyond the curtained window. More relaxing thoughts, thoughts of home, ebbed and flowed like cool waters through his mildly aching head. Soothing thoughts. Like roses casting their fragrance out into the quiet night air, each one ensnaring him momentarily and dispelling his ache as he passed them slowly by…

A sweeter flower than any other caught his eye. His thoughts of her had returned now, after they had been so prematurely interrupted before. Such a rose she was to look upon; sometimes he could hardly allow himself the pleasure. Such wondering also seemed occasionally to bring with it a certain sense of… not guilt, necessarily. Not anxiety, either. But he felt some sort of reservation, about allowing his thoughts to wander so uninhibited, when they were about Theodora. Was it right to do so, so early?

She was a truly beautiful soul. She had captivated him effortlessly. In some ways, he felt as if he had known her for many years already, and in others he could feel so strongly the magnetism of their very new, very delicate connection. He admired her gentle conviction, her curiosity and willingness, her way of approaching things and overcoming challenges with an unusually settled ease for someone so young. He was in awe of her, as he had been in awe of so many other freshly budding lifeforms; she was like a new running of vine. One’s eyes could not help but be pulled along every part of her. 

He found himself only slightly conflicted. There was much respect he held for her, and for the particular dynamic that was the basis for their knowing each other. She was still very much a student, and she was still operating under his mentor-like influence in some ways, especially considering her age and her limited experience within both the study and the church. This predicament he sometimes found himself in was conjured only by this; without it, he would have no second thoughts about allowing himself to entertain all kinds of notions about her. After his accumulated years and his own life’s work in the sacrament of sin, he had no qualms whatsoever about that sort of indulgence, and oh, how she drew him. He may be her superior, but reality was slowly coming to the surface from deep within him; she was the one presiding over more and more of his waking moments…

Lying there in the quiet stillness, blanketed with linen and the lingering warmth of the day, faint shivers trickled through the surface of his skin. How much, he had come to realize, he longed to feel her delicate touch… in some ways, he had already felt it. Memories began to pour themselves into the flow of his consciousness. 

Her fragile hand, cradled like a young bird in the firm grasp of his own. Warm and precious. Warmer, and warmer, as they danced. How her eyes had twinkled like the depths of midnight, dotted with endless stars, the hint of whiskey on her breath teasing at his senses…

How often he could touch her in seemingly the most inconspicuous of ways. The idea made his own hands begin to feel a little warm, but it was the truth. In their working hours together in the humid greenhouse, he could brush those hands against the small of her back, simply steadying her as he passed on by, and she never seemed to pull away. Place a hand against her shoulder and feel her almost lean into it, if he was not mistaken. There was certainly no mistaking the way her round cheeks would tint apple-red at even the slightest hint of lingering in a touch… she couldn’t hide it. And lately, he was beginning to feel more and more convinced that she wasn’t all that interested in hiding what sort of similar curiosities she might be feeling.

These quiet spring evenings found him with a lot more of her private company. Dinner, occasionally, and always easy, idle conversation. Working together was a joy and a privilege, but something about her relaxed, more genuine presence was a true pleasure. She seemed to give him more and more glimpses of her inner world whenever they were spending time together by themselves. With the time that passed she began to be more open with him about the details of her life before coming to the abbey; she seemed less worried about carefully constructing her words when recounting her memories of a lonely, difficult upbringing and a tumultuous launch into adulthood. More and more often, he could tell that she was telling him what it was that she really thought. With a bright, sharp mind like hers paired with her quick wit and propensity to tease, their talks were certainly never dull or uneventful. And he so truly enjoyed listening to her talk. Sometimes she was more serious, and their discussion explored experiences and more practical subjects. Other times- most often when they were high together, when she was so clearly unwound and open, she would lead him along through the rich landscape of her passing thoughts as easily as one might stroll through a garden. Her quiet voice was like a pathway.

Her voice- it had such a unique quality to it, he thought, for a woman her age. Full, resonant, not so fragile or high in pitch, and her mouth seemed to form so pleasantly around her syllables… and when her voice was slower, lower, it softened to a degree that never failed to make him feel positively enraptured. 

There was no denying the sensation beginning to stir in his body. His reservations about entertaining such thoughts began to grow weaker; pillars of resolve of any sort always crumbled away to dust if he thought about her long enough. The memory of her quiet voice ghosting in his ears fueled his heartbeat, picking up its pace. The sound of her little laugh, low and sweet as dark honey, began to leak into his very bloodstream. He flexed his hands into light fists, then let his fingers splay out against the linen bedding. Drawing a deep breath into his lungs only seemed to fan the flickers he would be helpless to quench now.

Why he ever felt any kind of hesitation to fantasize about Theodora, he couldn’t tell. Another deep breath, and now he found himself rolling to his side under the drape of the sheets. It would be one thing if the girl was only a student to him, mostly a stranger; if she only engaged with him in a professional capacity and nothing more. But the reality of how she engaged with him was much different. There was no reason for him to deny that the door was already open, nudged apart just enough, spilling the enticing light of invitation between the two of them.

And if he was entirely honest, he had touched her much less inconspicuously within the last couple of weeks or so. There was no reason to pretend to himself that he hadn’t. Warmth tinged like glowing embers in his chest, prickling at the tips of his ears and at his throat, as more memories bobbed up to the surface. 

Even a blind man could have felt the heat of her desire gleaming like guidelights in the depth of her eyes, on that windswept, frigid night in the study. In her moment of brief frustration he had seen his chance to bring her close and seized it perhaps without fully thinking it through, but when she had plodded shyly over to his chair and allowed him to grasp her, pull her down to meet him face to face, he had been rewarded generously for what he knew was such a blatant move. Ruby blood blooming to her pale skin, her night-dark eyes quickly glistening with a sheen of what he recognized to be something that made his fists squeeze tightly again even now- surrender.

Instinctively he felt his hips shift over, twisting his back just slightly to press his pelvis flat against the soft mattress. His heartbeat was getting heavier, the organ beating more pressure against the inside of his ribs as the memory played out. That shade of surrender in her eyes was pure fuel; a door blown off its hinges. It was unmistakable and thrilling. It had surged a lust so hot and volatile through his veins that he had nearly acted on it in the very instant. Watching her pillow-soft lips close around the papery stem of her nightcap, watching her eyes flash and then soften almost imperceptibly when his little magic trick had worked and lit her flame… how he had carefully pulled it from her mouth and then her smoke-saturated breath had rolled out like seeping fog, caressing his own warming face…

The scene played out in the theater of his mind’s eye again and again, and he breathed deeper, crushing his face against the pillow for a moment and sighing heavily. The breath pushed through his vocal chords and almost brought a groan with it. Here he was at just about the point of no return; already he could feel his blood running hotter and moving, rushing like whitewater, descending through his body with every second that he envisioned her pretty blushing face.

Her eyes, her brow. The apples that were her soft cheeks. The rose that was her soft mouth. Satanas. The way he had lit her joint that night was nothing compared to the way he hadn’t been able to help himself that very next day- hell below, in front of so many eyes, right there at the administering of unholy communion. One look into those deep, earthy eyes with the halo of her glossy curls framing the sweet moon of her face and he might as well have taken her right then and there, but instead he had settled for brazenly gliding his thumb against the most beautiful, wet, blossom-pink tongue he thought he had ever seen.

Now he did groan, quietly, a half-sigh into the fluff of the down pillow. Resolve and restraint were now just distant memories as that familiar, creeping heat of arousal began to move through his body; lower, lower, til the core of his stomach felt like a glowing red coil and he could feel how much his cock, pressed somewhat between the mattress and his inner thigh, was really beginning to fill out.

His years had absolutely no fight against the way that she incited the strongest, most unspeakable lust in him. It was almost shocking how effortlessly even just the image of her was enough to turn the clock back decades, enough to make him feel as overcome and helpless to the whim of his body’s need as a young man would be. Desperate, almost. Maybe he was more desperate for her than he could even fully comprehend.

Desperate enough to have caved to the urge to touch her again, reminded the voice in his head, and now everything around him faded away into nothingness as he let his hips surge forward against the pressure of the mattress; once, slowly, and then again, harder, but it wouldn’t be nearly enough. At mass he had touched her mouth through the flexible leather of his gloves, where he could feel her warmth and the slip of her skin, but that had only fueled his fire instead of dousing it- it had only been a matter of days before he was giving her that communion of sweet citrus and savoring the hot, velvety-slick texture of her tongue under the pad of his thumb. Again that unmistakable glaze of surrender had been so apparent in her wide eyes. Seeing her in such a state, where she was so quickly and utterly consumed by her surprise and then, for the most brief and tantalizing moment, her submission-

He felt his jaw tighten around a deep breath through his nose, felt the pulling of muscle in his neck and shoulders as he twisted his head up and back against the pillow with a heavy exhale. Quickly his thoughts began to narrow and simplify, shedding the excess introspection and normalcy until there was nothing much left at all but her.

Shifting again to lay somewhat on his front and prop his hips up on their side, bracing one leg up comfortably, the first grasp of his hand around his shaft pulled another sigh from his chest. Already he was so hard, his flesh filling out fast with arousal and immediately he wondered what the soft grasp of her pretty hand would feel like there. She kept her skin so soft, her nails always done nicely; sweet, womanly hands always hiding under the heavy garden gloves she wore to protect them, but displayed so pleasantly when they were alone together. How often he could hardly keep his gaze from locking onto them, as she lazily twiddled and swirled a smoldering joint between her fingers, or idly toyed with a succulently-soft lock of her hair. His hand began to move instinctively and the ripple of relief and pleasure made his eyelids sink closed.

Those hands, perched on wrists that led to such shapely forearms, off of which the sunlight of midday would gleam so nicely when her skin was wet with backspray from the garden hose. Wet hands, wet arms, reaching up above her head to smooth her delicate fingers back over the top and the crown of her head… the expression that would flitter so fast across her face at the cool relief of it on a hot afternoon…

She was gorgeous in even the simplest of moments such as that. In every little one of her mundane actions, he thought himself more than lucky to bear witness to a woman like her. How full and rounded her beauty was. How she glistened so enticingly like a swollen rosehip; how she sparkled like golden wine in a crystal glass.

“Here, I’ll take that for you,” she offered, her voice slow and lazy like a river of honey, and before he could protest she was up off of the couch. The swish of her silk skirt brushed against his knees, and the silken touch of her hand brushed his own when she took the empty glass from it. Words failed him; he could only tilt his loosened gaze up to the smile she wore and try to remember to keep a tight rein on the thoughts that quickly conjured and swirled in his hazy mind.

Watching her hips sway as she went to the desk didn’t make that much easier to do. Wine filling the glass sounded enticing as ever, and when she turned to come back to him he felt a smile pulling at his face.

“Awfully full,” he commented, the sound of his own voice so deep and relaxed almost foreign to his ears. The music of the easy, warm laugh that slipped under her breath nearly sparked shivers on his skin.

“Oh, as if,” she teased. When she came to stand in front of him he found that she leaned down to him ever slightly, bringing a light waft of that perfume she sometimes wore. It crept into his awareness and made him breathe in deeply, and now he watched her slightly-flushed face and her lips spreading into a half-smile. “You can handle it,” she assured him, feigning seriousness in her tone as she transferred the generous glass back into his grasp. Those soft fingers of hers; how he savored the featherlight brushes of them in moments like this. Then her eyes flicked up to ensnare his own gaze.

“Can’t you, Papa?”

“Yes,” he whispered harshly, hissing it as his head lolled to sink half of his face back into the pillow, and his hips strained forward into the tight pumps of his broad hand over his roused, eager cock. Even just imagining her made him forget himself; made his body and brain give in to the demand of this quickly-building pleasure as he would if he were in the prime of his life. His own touch was good, familiar- it was muscle memory to work his fingers and palm with just enough pressure- but what he really sought, what his body so deeply craved, was her touch.

The mere idea of it was almost, dare he say, too good. He was already so hard he was throbbing, already slicking his own well-controlled grip with the leaks of his slippery precum, and now the smooth machine of his arm and wrist and hand moved faster as the hot coil of pleasure and pressure in his belly glowed brighter and brighter. His feet pressed mindlessly against the mattress for some purchase as his hips moved with a mind entirely of their own, pressing and straining harder as he worked his cock more fervently. His own hot breath coming deep and heavy against the pillow made his face feel hotter, hotter still with the flashes of heat and desire searing over his skin and all throughout his body, and the flashes of thought that brought the decadent taste of her touch, her buttery soft skin, the idea of what her sweet rosebud smile might look like wrapped tight and sucking around-

The mouthful of sticky sweet dessert went down with a deep mmmmn and a delicate flutter of her long, feathery lashes. Tearing his eyes away from the way she sucked the spoon nearly crystal-clean proved nearly impossible. Watching her like this made time move in slow motion, and he tried to commit every little detail of her face to memory before she finished her bite. It wasn’t every day that the dinner menu included cinnamon roll-style coffee cake for dessert, and  certainly not with a warm vanilla glaze that just seemed designed to tempt. It clung to the corners of her mouth, smeared over her pillowy bottom lip that she mindlessly swiped clean with a lazy sweep of her tongue over it. If he didn’t feel so stricken with the scrumptious sight of her, he may have been bold enough to offer to help her clean it up.

“Mm, damn, that’s good,” she finally remarked after a thick swallow. Still his eyes were glued to her as she washed it down with a sip of her drink. Even something as innocent as a spoonful of sweetness in her mouth was enough to make him have to remember to keep his breath steady. And the absentminded nudge of her tongue against each corner of her lips made his grasp curl just that much tighter around his own spoon, pulled the skin taut over his knuckles as-

He gripped himself just enough, starting to let the rock of his hips take over the rhythm of how he fucked his cock firmly into the vice of his hand. His staggered exhales burned hot and his eyes, half-open, were so hazy- clouded entirely now with the visions of her that just accelerated the building of his need, his desperation to give it to her, to have her. To breach the barriers that barely still stood and take her, take her anywhere she would have him and pin her into this hold and split the velvet grip of her cunt all the way open. A sound shook out of his throat; a trembling, groaned sort of breath. Pleasure arced through his core and down the length of his ruddy, aching cock. Satanas almighty- he was completely weak in the face of the possibility, of the idea of what her pretty figure might look like pinned underneath him or perched on his lap. The idea of how tempting and decadent her pussy must look, hidden away between thighs he was sure must be so pillowy soft, and the idea of how she must feel…

“Fuck,” he whispered to the night air, “fuck, Theodora.”

The way she might have answered played out in his mind and he could not help but let out another sound, pleasure playing his vocal chords; he was so close, right there at the precipice and inching closer, closer, with every thought of her sweet voice moaning, sighing, swearing, shaking-

-the excess soil from her gloves, flecks of rich dark substrate falling to the table’s surface. She gave a satisfied sigh and then leaned down closer to the tray, seeming to slowly inspect the surface of each cell, where together they had painstakingly sowed countless seeds all afternoon long. She was so captivating when she was so focused on a task like she had been with this one.

“Did you sow them deeply enough?” he asked, casually, and to that she gave a playful sort of chuckle.

“Oh I’m sure I did,” she assured him, flicking her glance up to him with a wisecrack sort of smile and a twinkle in her eyes. “Did you sow yours deep enough, Papa?”

She was teasing him, stirring that particular kind of magic that he so enjoyed in their interactions. He smiled down at her. “You know I am meticulously careful with seeds, Theo.”

“Mhmm,” she answered, and raised her brow a little- “I know how you hate to waste them.”

Something about the way she said it almost made him wonder, in that moment… but then her smile softened and she was moving along from that, so he didn’t bother to entertain the thread of what may or may not have been. Their work was rife for all manner of innuendo, it seemed- the parallels of seeds and earth and new life all existing as rather low-hanging fruit for such a witty girl like Theo. He leaned his hip against the edge of the table and watched as she smiled down at the long tray of soil cells, admiring all of their hard work. “Especially when we want the best chances of germination.”

“It shouldn’t be an issue,” he assured her, and she reached to delicately brush an uneven cell surface back into place.

“Oh?”

“I believe this is a fresh mix.”

“Ah,” she replied absentmindedly, and for some reason the way she was tenderly adjusting the levels of certain cells here and there was really pulling his gaze, like a moth to flame. Her hands, even encased in the gloves she wore, moved so particularly. Focused as she was again on this new task, her voice softened. “So it should be especially fertile, then.”

There was a word he hadn’t heard from her mouth before. It was a lasso tossed right around the core of his body- it snared him fast and yanked him tight. Quickly he realized he would have to be careful with his answer, or-

He would have shown her exactly how deeply he knew to sow his seed, exactly how he wanted to pump her pretty, pink, fertile cunt full with every last drop, if she had been here with him now. He wanted her here, needed her here, needed to feel how she would cling desperately to his body and how her tilted hips would shake and how her deep womanly sounds would drown out everything else as he made her cum jerking and trembling underneath him. Suddenly that hot tension in his core pulled tight as a spring; he felt his flesh tighten, draw up, and he panted quietly, fucking staggered thrusts into the slippery tightness of his hand and bringing his other hand to let his fingers twist and work over his deliciously sensitive and drippy cockhead, until that brutally-tight coil finally released with a snap.

“Theodora,” he groaned, deep and strained, cumming hard and fast as fire igniting, the heat sweeping fully through him as his cock kicked hard and and spurted his hot, sticky seed into the loose hold of his other hand. His heartbeat pounded like deafening drums in his flesh, in his ears, and his blood rushed in a powerful current through his body. As the orgasm took him his hips kept mindlessly pushing his throbbing cock back and forth in his grasp, wringing out every last bit of pleasure and milking the last spurts and drips of cum from himself. Satanas in hell- he couldn’t hold back his groans, or the way that her name kept coming off of his tongue like it was written to be said by him. Theodora. Theodora…

Time felt so distorted while his nerve endings all surged with the rush of his orgasm- but soon enough, he felt himself begin to come down from the climax. Eventually, weakly, he let himself roll to his back and heave out a deep, satisfied sort of sigh. The aftermath of such pleasure glowed like warm sunlight through his flesh. Sinking deeply against the bedding, he allowed his eyes to slip closed.

When he opened them again, it was clear he must have dozed momentarily. The promise of restful, deep sleep was awfully tempting and pulled eagerly at his tired body, but he was also entirely a mess. She always made him this way, it seemed; even the mere thought of Theodora and her sweetness brought a level of intensity to his pleasure that he had not felt in a very long while. He would have to get up and deal with it before the sheets on this bed that he was a guest in were a lost cause, but… ah, he thought, to hell with it. For now, he was happy to relax back into the satisfaction of such release and contentment, and allow his mind to return eagerly to those sweet thoughts of the girl he could not wait to come home to.

my ao3

their main fic: fruit of the vine, work of our hands

thanks for reading!

[shamandrummer]

Urban Shamanism: Ancient Wisdom in a Modern World

In the heart of the concrete jungle, amidst the hustle and bustle of city life, an ancient practice is quietly re-emerging--Urban Shamanism. Traditionally, shamanism has been associated with indigenous cultures, remote landscapes, and deep connection to nature. But as the world evolves and urbanization dominates, the call of the shamanic path has found a new home within cities, offering seekers a way to integrate ancient wisdom into their fast-paced, modern lives.

What is Urban Shamanism?

Urban Shamanism is the adaptation of traditional shamanic practices to the context of city life. It involves working with spirit, energy, and nature in an environment where forests are replaced by skyscrapers and rivers by bustling streets. Despite the challenges of modern living, Urban Shamanism offers a means to cultivate spiritual awareness, heal, and navigate life with deeper wisdom and intuition.

At its core, shamanism is about accessing altered states of consciousness to receive guidance, healing, and knowledge. This can be achieved through meditation, drumming, dance, breathwork, and connecting with spirit guides or ancestors. In urban settings, shamanic practitioners learn to find nature within the chaos, drawing energy from parks, rivers, the sky, and even the hum of city life itself.

The Need for Urban Shamanism

Many people today feel disconnected from nature, themselves, and their spiritual essence. The demands of modern life--career pressures, technology overload, and constant distractions--can lead to stress, anxiety, and a lack of fulfillment. Urban Shamanism serves as a bridge between the ancient and the contemporary, helping individuals reconnect with their inner selves, the energies around them, and the unseen forces of the universe.

Moreover, cities, despite their artificial appearance, are alive with energy. Every street has its own rhythm, every building carries history, and every person contributes to a dynamic flow of energy. By engaging with these unseen aspects, urban shamans can harmonize their surroundings and develop a heightened awareness of their place within the greater web of life.

Practices of the Urban Shaman

Sacred Spaces in the City

One of the first steps in Urban Shamanism is creating or discovering sacred spaces within the city. This can be a small altar in one's home, a quiet corner in a park, a rooftop with a view of the sky, or even a favorite cafe where one feels at peace. These spaces serve as sanctuaries for reflection, meditation, and ritual.

2. Nature Connection

Even in the busiest cities, nature persists. Urban shamans cultivate relationships with trees in parks, birds on balconies, rivers flowing beneath bridges, and even the wind that weaves through the streets. Simple acts like walking barefoot on the grass, touching a tree with intention, or listening to the sounds of the city with mindfulness can strengthen this connection.

3. Shamanic Journeying

Shamanic journeying is a key practice that involves entering a trance-like state to explore spiritual realms, meet guides, and gain wisdom. Drumming, chanting, or using rhythmic breathing can facilitate this process. In an urban setting, soundscapes such as the rhythm of subway trains, the pulse of city life, or even recorded drumming can assist in reaching altered states.

4. Energetic Cleansing

Cities are filled with intense energies from people, technology, and emotions. Urban shamans practice energy cleansing techniques such as smudging with sage or palo santo, using sound (bells, singing bowls, clapping), or visualizing white light surrounding them. These practices help clear negativity and maintain spiritual balance.

5. Dreamwork and Symbolism

Urban Shamans pay close attention to their dreams and the symbolism in their daily lives. A chance encounter, a repeated number pattern, or an unexpected event may hold deep meaning. By developing a heightened sense of awareness, they begin to navigate life with greater insight and intuition.

6. Healing and Service to the Community

Traditionally, shamans are healers and guides. In the urban context, this can manifest as energy healing, intuitive counseling, community work, or even artistic expression. Urban shamans often feel called to help others--whether through Reiki, sound healing, activism, or creating safe spaces for spiritual exploration.

Challenges and Misconceptions

Urban Shamanism is not without its challenges. One major hurdle is skepticism, as mainstream society often dismisses shamanic practices as superstition. Additionally, finding time for spiritual practices amidst the demands of city life can be difficult. However, by weaving shamanic consciousness into daily routines--through mindfulness, intention, and small rituals--urban dwellers can integrate this path seamlessly.

There is also the issue of cultural appropriation. Many shamanic traditions come from indigenous cultures with rich histories and sacred practices. It is crucial for those drawn to Urban Shamanism to approach it with respect, study the traditions they draw from, and give back to the communities that have preserved these teachings.

The Future of Urban Shamanism

As more people seek meaning beyond material success, Urban Shamanism continues to gain traction. It provides a way for city dwellers to access deep spiritual truths without having to abandon their lives and move to the wilderness. With the rise of online communities, workshops, and books dedicated to modern shamanic practices, it is easier than ever to learn and share these wisdom traditions.

Ultimately, Urban Shamanism is about finding the sacred in the everyday, recognizing that the divine is not confined to remote landscapes but exists in the very fabric of our cities. It teaches that even amidst the noise and speed of modern life, one can walk the shamanic path, heal, grow, and serve as a bridge between worlds.

For those willing to look beyond the concrete and into the unseen, the ancient call of the shaman is still alive--whispering through the wind, glowing in the neon lights, and beating in the heart of the city itself.

[peedleedoo]

Things I would like for neopets:

- acknowledgement of dated site themes and work towards changing the different lands that are culture based to be about cultural celebration rather than early 2000s depictions that are insensitive and ignorant.

- move away from whatever their current marketing model is to filling a niche that they already fill, but poorly, in a creative outlet for all ages with lore and events that is entirely browser based with offshoots in other media (phone games, merch, etc)

- utilize funds for the hiring of more competent employees who do moderation and PR type activities. Too many of their current employee resources are being used to shill out new NC items every day. Stop that!

- upgrade site security and layout to be not what it is now. Plenty of sites have better layouts and don’t drag their feet with every content update and release. Base it on modern simplicity with integration of the nostalgic theme of the older site, such as using the neopets font on things. There’s so many nice web developers who could do this. Why aren’t you?

- quality control their releases. Stop releasing weird items without assessing them first? Is just one guy doing that? What is even going on

- move away from the witch hunt style board policing they’re implementing and make instead it into an environment for decent discussion. Remove posts for flaming and intentionally trying to rile up other users for reactions. Tell people they shouldn’t be oversharing on neopets.

- delete the camouflage chia for looking like bird poop